Continue to Continue

Some days, life is better than other days. This week has been kind of hellish. My brother-in-law, one of the people that manages the Yahoo folks who create all those ads, discovered he has Leukemia. Mike's sister is still in shell shock. But there's been a good trend with the chemo he has had, knocking down the 'count' from 320 or so to less than 80, where this 'count' should be.

If there ever was a cure, now's the time. This man has two children, Alice and Johnny, very nice, well-behaved and creative kids who just love their father - a man who can't help but smile and make those around him want to, as well.

You have to think about these things, as I do, when planting new plants for the fall, knowing that Winter will cut out some of the harvest, as early as mid-November. Such is life. But we still plant, still hope and wonder what it would be to have our own lives cut short or pulled from our current path onto another one that's not so bright, not so brilliant. You have to think about these things when you go through life normally, day-to-day, without the affect of a disease of your own blood, without worrying whether you will be retiring one day, or living your life as an invalid, whatever life you have left on this old planet. Maybe 'think' isn't the right word. You are blessed if you are not thinking about these things. As I am.

So today I am thankful, wholly aware of all that is good around me -- the animals, the farm, my guy who sits across from me (as I write) this learning about new woodworking techniques with his new equipment.

I wonder about those out there who have discovered their loves have shortened lives or lives that will be very different from the way it has ALWAYS been. I wonder if they realize how much strength they will need just to continue to continue.

And so I sleep, a heavy heart, but one that need not be - for it is not my life, right? For it is another's, one that is distant from mine that suffers, right? No, it remains with me, this weird feeling that I am so lucky to not have this trauma in my life, to not know the dread of having to be in hospitals, of blood testing, of some set of doctors watching over my progress or egress from this life.

I am so very lucky. I hope you are, too.